Beth Osmer

Why We Can’t Stop Ourselves


noun \ al·co·hol \ˈal-kə-ˌhȯl\

Alcohol is everywhere in our society. It is in restaurants, commercials on television and in print, and billboard advertisements for sporting events. It is hard to avoid seeing it all around us. In a world of “FOMO” (fear of missing out), we don’t want to be left out or miss out on the fun especially when we become parents. Couple that with motherhood and how imperfect it can make us feel, and the emotions start rolling in. Motherhood can bring loneliness and depression. It can make us feel overwhelmed and not equipped for this thing called parenting.

In a previous blog post, I delve into the topic of mothers who drink. It is common for families to use denial to justify the mother’s alcohol dependency. At first, it is understandable because each family loves and wants to protect each other, but there comes a time when denying the depths of this negatively affects each person in the family. The daily struggle of motherhood includes being time-starved and sleep-deprived. Alcohol can numb the emotional roller-coaster of parenting and make us feel a little better about how anxious and isolated we’re feeling. Drinking is a short-lived relief from the reality.

We find ourselves drinking too much too often. At some point we know we’re drinking too much but we can’t seem to get out of the alcohol trap. Women who aren’t telling their doctor the truth when asked how much alcohol they consume. Women who don’t consider drinking a few drinks every night after their kids go to bed a drinking problem.

Sometimes we want to stop drinking. Sometimes we want to get rid of the liquor habit but not the happy hour habit. We are afraid of losing our social life as a result. Some of us do want to desperately stop drinking, and we find that we can stop, but we don’t know how to stay stopped. Sometimes it is hard to fix a problem until you see it exists. Addiction to alcohol is a craving and it is an escape from pain. Sometimes when we are trying to escape our reality, alcohol can cause mood swings and behavior changes, along with feelings of relaxation and calm.

Suffice it to say there are plenty of women that can keep their drinking under control. And those who know they are drinking too much can pinpoint it by surrounding themselves with enablers. In a society that celebrates drinking – and advertises that it will make you feel good and you will have fun – it allows you to pretend that your daily habit is ok. It may even reassure you that what you’re doing is fine.

It is important to talk about alcohol addiction in a relatable way, for women and especially mothers. There are ways to find help and advice without being patronized. If you or someone you care about is struggling with alcohol, please let us know. Contact us at 415.724.7767 to learn more about how hypnosis can help with addiction. We can work to help you find the root causes behind those frequent “bad days.” ReFind  is a great resource to engage with as part of your recovery from your addiction to alcohol. We offer programs with a variety of lengths and focuses tailored to help you where you need it. Contact us today for a free  30- minute  consultation session. To book your appointment,  click here.

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